I’ve heard it all my life. First from my parents, then from my colleagues at school, finally from coworkers. Sometimes even random people at parties. Why are we expected to smile all the time?
You’ve probably heard about the “resting bitch face” syndrome. If not, please find definition below:
I’ve grown to learn that apparently I suffer from that syndrome, and that is because:
1. I am a woman
2. I really don’t smile all the time
3. I am assertive and say whatever goes on my mind
And finally I don’t melt in fake sympathies all day long.
If I am not smiling all the time like Heidi in the Swiss Alps:
1. That does not mean I bored,
2 That doesn’t mean I hate every single human being,
3. That does not mean I am unhappy and bitter
And finally, it doesn’t mean I am angry at you. But I’ll be if you keep pushing it.
Why can’t I just BE?
I am telling you why: because I am a woman and society expects me to be agreeable, nice and what is misunderstood as “feminine” all the time. At least I don’t feel alone on this. Kristen Stewart, for instance. In my humble opinion, an extremely good actress and an intelligent, very cultured woman. She has been judged all the time for being “inexpressive”, for “not smiling”, not being “emotional enough”.
Have you ever heard someone saying this about a guy? Asking him to smile more? Are you bored, because you look so serious? Or have you heard someone telling a guy off because he’s not emotional enough? Or that a guy has bitch face on? If you do, congrats. You witnessed something unusual and rare. They don’t even understand how lucky they are to have the privilege of just being.
I actually do smile and laugh a lot. I do it when I feel so. When I am with my friends, when someone shares an actual funny and pertinent joke, when I actually think about something dirty or even dark. I am #sorrynotsorry if my face is not agreeable. Most times I have “my bitch face on”, I am actually only thinking on my grocery shopping list or in what to have for dinner later. Meaning:
- No, I am not planning any murderous act any time soon.
- No, not exactly working on a world domination plan.
- No, I don’t hate you or everyone in the world.
I feel as misunderstood as the famous Grumpy Cat:
Have you ever suffer from this “why are you so bored” bombing? Or have you ever been misjudged as a total scheming bitch just because of the so-called “bitch face”? Having as a background noise something as the below:
If so, raise your fingers:
And since everyone thinks you’re bitch already, just enjoy it and actually be one.